Monday, December 24, 2007

Don't You Give Up (An Ode to Sequence and Life)

Don't You Give Up (An Ode to Sequence and Life)

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

I said get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up, get up
Sit back down

Right on up, we're gonna funk you right on up

Sequence said it best

Testing us to get up and shake what our mommas gave us

They raised us and made us want more

Of something

Something that we didn't understand back then

Something we thought beyond our reach back then and

Something we still strive for

Again and again, man

Hey you sitting over there

You betta get up outta yo chair

And work your body down

No time to funk around

Cause we've got work to do

can't let small things

Stand between you and greatness

Debating between failure and defeat

Sitting with negativity begging at your feet

Overcoming the overcame

And still singing slave ship spirituals

You better ask somebody upwardly mobile

Holding success in their hearts

Working smarter for the almighty dollar

Saying prayers and counting blessings

While you're at home still trying to learn old lessons, but

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

Don't you give up… a-keep going, a-keep going, a-keep going ahh

One of my sistas told me

I was an untapped resource

My own worst enemy

Blinded by the bling

And chasing dreams from my living room sofa

Another of my sistas told me

I stood for things I didn't know of

Told me being down only meant I had one way to go

Showed me how to cultivate the motivation

By changing my radio station

And the revelation was endless

Ring a ding-ding-ding-dong
Ring a ding-ding-ding-dong

Then it happened

I found that `IT'

That `go tell it on the mountain' mentality

Fallacy had me believing the unbelievable

Now I know TRUTH

Sound the alarm

`cause it's a new day and I'm living it MY way

Palms together, sweaty, like I'm praying for the first time

Eyes wide open, like I'm seeing for the first time

Ignoring that knock on my door… for the first time

Evil wants to gain entrance

Despair wants to have breakfast and

Sin wants to wrestle… for old time's sake

But I don't have a moment for them… anymore

Don't want their company… anymore

Glory is delighting in my abode and I enjoy basking in its brilliance

I love its warm and humbling feeling

And I invite you to indulge

I invite you to partake in its awakening sensation

Invite you in for some `real' conversation

All you have to do is…

Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up

But you can't sit back down…ahh

12.24.07 Genesis

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Can't Let You Take Me Away...

Christmas is a happy and sad time for all... well all the people that I know anyway.
Trying to come up with money to buy gifts for others... putting off paying bills just to see someone smile... I'm guilty of it too

But what I hadn't anticipated was that someone I love dearly trying to take me away from all I enjoy...
I love spending time with my parents... there are so few people who can say that (actually they find it DISTURBING that I talk to and visit my parents EVERY SINGLE day... hmmm)
I love reading... I've been told I read too much (though I think THAT'S impossible)
I love writing... I've been told I write too much (though I think THAT'S insane)
I love talking to my friends on the phone... I've been told I talk to them too much (though when we talk, they can't handle my realism and concreteness... say what you mean and mean what you say)

I know it's a cry for attention and I must be honest... always have been, always will be
I'm self-absorbed and they knew that upon meeting me 10 years ago
Not so self-absorbed that I'm selfish... just self-absorbed in a way that makes me a highly motivated person... because my kids need a better future... and it depends on the baby steps I'm taking now

But Aquarians have been known to be unsympathetic and aloof... I'm guilty... especially if you try to take ME away... I back away from you... feeding you morsels of myself, just enough to make your mouth water... just enough to let you know I still love and care for you but I won't indulge in your toxicity. That's just me... and when you become too poisonous, I disappear.

So maybe I'll read a little less... maybe, I'll write one less paragraph but I won't do much more than that. I can't do much more than that. What will become of ME... the ME that I love, the ME that I enjoy. I've sacrificed all that I can and sadly for them, I'm not willing to sacrifice much more.

I saw a saying in a store yesterday:

Don't spend all of your time preparing for the future, that you forget to live

It was meant for me, I know that. So I grabbed my WWJD coin from my pocket and rubbed it, then thanked Him. When I got home, I passed the coin on to someone I know who needs it more than me... maybe they'll do some self-reflection and realize that what I do makes me happy and in turn should make them happy... maybe they'll find a hobby that makes them just as happy... maybe they'll stop being so selfish and realize that all I do is for the love of them, my kids, and my parents but also for the love of myself. Because, heaven forbid, I lose them all tomorrow, there will aways be a book to read and a book to write that will ease my pain... and make me smile.

Stay peace


Tuesday, December 18, 2007

I Anxiously Await 2008

So many lessons learned in 2007. Some would say they were bad events, I just call them challenges. All of the struggling, I know for sure, is for the good that is to come in 2008. The one thing I learned, and preached but had not practiced, is planning. I fell short. Planning a few things and leaving others to umm... destiny, when they shouldn't have be left there. I know better now.

Things I've prayed for have come to fruition... not in the way I wanted them to come... but they're here and I must embrace them... though differently, but embrace them still the same. Just to give you an example of what I mean... I prayed for more time to devote to writing... then I was laid off, in June... and I wrote and still write. I prayed to be able to go back to school... graduate school... found out that I could apply to the city for funding... yes free money... but it didn't cover graduate studies... got the money and attended a technical school... am now a PC Specialist... finished the 14 week program in 4 weeks... cause I'm a nerd and serious about my shit (Thanks Ms. Badu, that's the best line ever!).

But you see, I'm not scared of a little struggling or even a lot of it. Cause then things are right, they are REAL right and I can't accept the good without a little of the other.

Stay peace and focused

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